Apologetic Meeting

Posted on Sat Jun 21, 2025 @ 12:34am by Commander Cara Letsul & Lieutenant T'Lul
Edited on on Sat Jun 21, 2025 @ 6:04am

2,821 words; about a 14 minute read

Mission: Time After Time
Location: Arboretum

As requested from the Commodore, to apologize to T'lul Cara decided to prep herself before seeking out the counselor. Part of her preparation was getting her emotions completely in check. And to where they wouldn't be able to be read. She wasn't going to allow T'Lul to get to her.

A step into the holosuite, calm serene music played while rain was falling slowly. Cara danced, doing a graceful Kata, wearing loose and flowing robes of oriental design. A light blue robe with pale pink cherry blossoms. She glided across the dance floor, spinning effortlessly, becoming one with the music. When the music came to an end, Cara felt serenity descend upon her. Her mental shields rising.

Exiting the holo suite. Cara tapped upon her comm badge. "Counselor T'Lul this is Cara Letsul, I wish to speak to you. Where shall we meet?" Her voice was devoid of emotions.

T'Lul heard the comm and was quite curious as to the reason that the XO was contacting her. The XO's dramatic exit from their initial meeting would have indicated that the XO had no intention of speaking with her. So, it was unlikely that she was going to discuss her psychological exam. So why did the XO want to speak with her? Perhaps it would be better if they met somewhere that the XO was more comfortable. =^= You wish to speak. I know not the topic. Perhaps you would desire to select a place that you would be most comfortable for you. =^=

"The Arboretum in the gazebo near the pond." Cara responded, "I will be waiting for you there."

=^= Very well, T'Lul out. =^=

Just as Cara had stated, she was waiting for T'Lul to meet her there. The gazebo was made of cured natural wood color, a small foot bridge extended to where it overlooked the water. Cara was seated there, her eyes closed, listening to the sounds of this area.

T'Lul arrived and decided to watch Cara for a moment. It was apparent to T'Lul from watching Cara that Cara was attempting to calm herself. This was not a meeting that Cara was looking forward to. Caution was in order. Thus, she decided to make herself known so that Cara would not be taken unawares. She called out while approaching at a leisurely pace, "Greetings, Commander. I have come as you have requested."

Cara's slowly opened her eyes. She had noticed someone approaching, then heard T'Lul's voice. Rising up from the bench she had been sitting upon, Cara gave a graceful formal bow. "Thank you for coming, Counselor T'Lul. Would you like to have a seat?" Cara moved slightly to the right to allow T'Lul to have a seat to the left, if she chose to do so.

Cara took a seat once more, her hands loosely clasped together. Her gaze was calm much like a pond at rest. In her mind a piece of music played, one restful, zen like.

Her voice was measured, once more devoid of emotion. "I requested to meet with you, to convey my regrets as to my outburst." Cara was rather Vulcan like in her demeanor.

T'Lul was not about to correct Cara on whether she had a preference for sitting or not when Cara was clearly directing T'Lul to sit. The Vulcan had long become accustomed to the idiosyncrasies of non-Vulcan speech. To make Cara comfortable, she sat where she was directed.

Upon hearing the statement from Cara, T'Lul tilted her head slightly and an eyebrow quirked upwards at an angle. "Your language is rather unemotional and Vulcan-like, Commander. That seems to indicate to me that you are uncomfortable and that your comment is forced. Am I correct?"

Cara regarded T'Lul for a few moments in dispassionate silence, before she answered. "No, you are not correct. For the outburst, I am sincere in my apology. Your words did sting me, as at the time I was in a vulnerable state, thinking that we could connect. That though, is now in the past. Would it be logical to hold onto that pain? I think not. The logical action would be to step beyond it, and progress forward."

T'Lul blinked a few times considering Cara's words. She was unconvinced, due to Cara trying very hard to speak in a more Vulcan-like way. "If you would like assistance with whatever is or was troubling you, I can provide that assistance. However, as you are not Vulcan, it is often a fallacy that one is able to simply set aside the pain. Often it is quite necessary to explore the cause of said pain so that one can understand it so one could learn from it and then move beyond it. What you have said skips those normal healing processes."

The Vulcan straightened her head and looked seriously at Cara. "I am not convinced that logic is the solution to every problem, Commander. My theories are not well regarded back home."

"The logic that I had spoken of, is that I acknowledge the pain, give its own time, then release it. This is the logical way to where it does not affect me anymore. One person's logic may not seem logical to others. It is a matter of perspective." She paused, "Your theories. What are they?" There was still no sign of her relenting to show any emotions.

"Boiled down to its core, that logic is an inadequate way to live. If biological beings were purely logical, then computers would still be superior. Consequently, I have concluded that logically, emotions must serve a purpose. I am attempting to integrate them with Surak's teachings." She tilted her head slightly, curious as to what Cara would think about that. "With the numerous Vulcans and half-Vuclans arriving recently, it is an opportunity to gather data."

"Your theories are fascinating, but, when it comes to the logic of keeping control of emotions, not showing them outwardly does have its logical reasoning. Striking a balance can also be logical. I have heard from others that a Vulcan showing emotions is nothing but a Romulan in disguise. Emotions can cloud one's judgement on matters, especially when faced with difficult decisions. Now, with how strong your species is and the volatile history before Surak put together his teachings. Surak was worried about the survival of your race and perhaps the other races that may come into contact with your people. If things continued to rise to more and more violence, your people could have wiped themselves out. Therefore, the teachings of controlling emotions was needed." Cara stated calmly. "There may be those who have the same reasoning as you do, their own ways to balance. In a time of chaos, logic, or redirecting one's emotional thoughts to something calmer and more constructive is better in the long run."

"You seem to be wavering on this topic. On one hand you suggest that not showing them has logical reason. On the other, you suggest that striking a balance is logical." T'Lul's face pointedly squinched her eyes to scrutinize Cara more closely. "Which do you really believe? It is obvious that you are controlling your emotions right now. What purpose does that serve?"

"It serves as a balancer, for me, Counselor T'Lul." Cara gazing at the Vulcan woman. "And I believe in both. That may sound paradoxical, though that, is what I believe."

There was still no showing of emotions, just calm placidness. "I chose to not be emotional at this time, to convey my apology for the outburst. Now that I have conveyed my sincere apology, I will not take up anymore of your time."

"Interesting," T'Lul answered. "For someone that was a counselor in her past, I would think that you would not choose to be unemotional. It is one thing to be professionally objective with a client but quite another to behave as you are now." She reached a conclusion. "Based on all of this, it is logical to conclude that you do not have an affinity for me and this apology was somewhat forced. Would that be accurate?"

"T'Lul do you or will you have an affinity for me? My choice to not show any emotion is my choice. When we first met during the meeting that the Commodore had called to, it felt that you did not have any affinity towards me. You discussed something that should have been just between you and the Commodore." Her voice was not monotone but still calm.

"I tried to get involved with a discussion, as we had been discussing at first the health of the station. At first I hadn't realized that you were talking about PonFar. You had shoved me to one side, and was I supposed to sit there while you were speaking about something personal? By your actions, I felt that you considered me an interloper." Cara shifted herself to where she was more focused upon T'Lul.

"Also you did get a little bit offish when I suggested that I bring in another counselor. I wasn't saying you weren't capable of taking on Civilians as well as StarFleet but I had found when I was a counselor, civilians were not willing to come to a StarFleet counselor. They wanted someone who was a civilian, not StarFleet. Someone who has an affinity for them, as they are a civilian much like they are." She still was calm in her words. "Would you go to a civilian Counselor if they do not know much about working in StarFleet?"

The Vulcan considered Cara's words, "I see. Deflection. Rather than answer my question, you have opted to make this about me. Since you have done so, I will address what I can. Hopefully, that will clear up your misunderstadings." She shifted, her eyes narrowing and a hand went to her hip. "Commander, you must remember that I am a Vulcan. I do not feel emotion the way that you seem to suggest. Second, the discussion with the Commodore was not completely about pon farr. Regardless, as a former counselor, you should know that is not a topic Vulcans discuss readily. Perhaps rather than having an emotional outburst, it would have been better to inquire as to the reason that I was discussing this matter. Perhaps you could have read my dossier and noticed my dissertation. There are now several Vulcans and partial Vulcans that can further my research. Instead of any such inquiry, you acted irrationally, emotionally, and impulsively. Some might say, childish. It is not a quality normally seen in an executive officer." For the moment, she let the topic of Cara's suggestion regarding counselors go. She expected the Commander to act rashly again.

"I do know that Vulcans do not feel emotions like other races. Nor do I expect them to do so. I do not regard them as emotionless robots either. Why does it bother you that I choose not to display any emotions at this time, instead just a serene calm. I had already acknowledged my actions early on and apologized for them. It wasn't forced, it was an honest apology. I do thank you for your insight, and will most assuredly look into your dossier, and your writings."

Her hands still remained loosely clasped her shoulders relaxed, no sign of tension. "Also, I would like to acknowledge the hard work you had put in to keep this station running as best as you could, from what I have noticed. Thank you. Not that you are asking for Validation as to what you have done, I am speaking of this out of respect for your endeavors. I can also empathize with what you have had to do, in protecting those that live here. It is a tough task to do so." Cara serenely uttered.

"You stated that it bothers me that you are not displaying emotions at this time. First, I am Vulcan. I do not experience such an emotion as being bothered. Your desire to ascribe emotion to me is misplaced. However, your refusal to display your emotions, especially when making what you claim to be a sincere apology is abnormal for your species. As a counselor, as you should know, I am trained to take note of such abnormalities and assist in finding the cause. This led to the logical conclusion that it was not sincere and was ordered. If I am in error, then I would ask for a correction on my findings, as I am curious where logic may have failed. As to the remainder, I simply did and continue to do my job. I do not require empathy."

"Counselor T'Lul. I am not full Betazed. I am a mix of Human and Betazed, and it is erroneous thinking that, all Betazeds will be emotional. I simply chose to do things in a calm manner. It is a choice to display emotions and to not display emotions. You had upset me, yes, however as I responded earlier, I chose to approach this in a calmer manner and demeanor." There was no flicker in her eyes, still calm, at peace. Even her breathing showed she was not upset at what T'Lul had said.

The counselor still did not believe Cara. She could meditate and hide her emotions, but suppress them entirely? Unlikely. "Humans are emotional. Betazoids are emotional, as well. I did not and do not separate by species. Again, you have made an assumption for me, which is false. Rather than guessing, I would suggest sticking to facts. There is nothing wrong with emotions or displaying them, if you are a species that is not trained to suppress them. It is generally encouraged and healthy."

"Indeed, what you say is true. Also, are Vulcans the only species that are trained to suppress emotions? There are those who have been trained, who are not Vulcan to suppress emotions, when it is called for them to do so. Such as Gamblers, who wish not to give off a tell when they might be bluffing. It is called a pokerface. I though, do know how to suppress emotions, to have a sense of calmness, it is from the martial arts I have been trained in. It is also from my other skills. When you make contact with another person, especially when trying to heal someone, the level of emotions is very important in order to not affect the natural energy and flow of the body's chi. " Cara still not budging in her not showing emotions.

T'Lul considered Cara's words and for the moment accepted those. "So why do you feel the need to suppress them with me?" she asked after several moments of thought.

"This is what I normally do when first meeting someone. I normally do not have my emotions going awry. This should have been more of a first contact. When I first met the Commodore, I was calm as well. Much like this. A calm mind and demeanor, helps to pave a way for better communication. A more diplomatic approach. Strong emotions, either good or bad can affect those who are in the area of said eruption. Therefore, having controlled emotions, is a better way to approach a matter, especially when an outburst like what I had done previously, wasn't appreciated not by any of us. It can be very draining."

Once again, T'Lul did not buy what Cara was selling. "I have always learned that first impressions create lasting memories and are difficult to erase the prejudices. Having a flat demeanor is not likely to assist you in building a rapport with someone. Do you think this is a wise strategy for first meetings?"

"It isn't a flat demeanor; it is a calm demeanor. Tibetan monks, they have that calmness of mind and demeanor. Not flat, not emotional but calm and serene. Most of the time I enter in with calm demeanor and ascertain and get a feeling of the situation, before engaging." A child's laughter carrying across the water caused Cara to look in that direction. A fleeting smile appeared then it dashed away.

Cara turned back to T'Lul her serene demeanor back into play. "We can sit here and be caught in a circle of my seemingly to justify what I see fit as to my choice of demeanor. I do understand you are trying to understand as to how I am. For now, I feel that we have discussed this enough. I apologized, and I will reiterate, that my apology was not forced. It is up to you to choose whether you will accept it or not. I do hope that we can find out more about each other as time goes on and perhaps find some common ground that we can discuss."

Unlikely, T'Lul thought to herself. "I am at your disposal," as well as the crew's.



Lieutenant T'Lul
Chief Counselor
DS5

Commander Cara Letsul
Executive Officer
Deep Space 5

 

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